Madam President, Queen of Snark (kellinator) wrote,
Madam President, Queen of Snark
kellinator

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Say it with me...

I'VE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERFUCKING SNAKES ON THIS MOTHERFUCKING PLANE!!!

I've been going back and forth for eons between my love of the cheese and my terror of snakes, which keeps me from watching stuff as innocuous as Crocodile Hunter (if Crocodile Hunter is not actually innocuous, don't blame me, I don't know because I don't watch the stuff). But yesterday ariedana sent me Samuel L. Jackson's most excellent Daily Show interview, and I decided that I love Samuel L. Motherfucking Jackson more than I fear the snakes. One co-worker suggested I write him a fan letter to tell him that. Another envisioned the commentary track on the DVD as performed by the snakes: "We thought this movie was our chance to shine as snakes... but it went terribly wrong!" I personally hope the DVD has that... plus a director's cut where all the snakes are replaced by Kaa from the Jungle Book.

Anyway, it's going to be the best movie ever. Samuel L. called and told me himself. Also, according to Wikipedia, he announced it to the world:

On June 3, 2006, Samuel L. Jackson said, while presenting the award for best movie at the MTV Movie Awards, "I'm here tonight to present the award everyone's been waiting for: best movie. Now, this award holds a special place in my heart because next year I'll be winning it for Snakes on a Plane. Now I know, I know that sounds cocky, but I don't give a damn. I am guaranteeing that Snakes on a Plane will win best movie next year. Does not matter what else is coming out. The New James Bond... no snakes in that! Ocean's 13... where my snakes at? Shrek the Third... green, but not a snake. No movie shall triumph over Snakes on a Plane. Unless I happen to feel like making a movie called Mo' Motha-fuckin' Snakes on Mo' Motha-fuckin' Planes."

So yes. I'm sneaking the booze into the theater. James is looking for rubber snakes at the dollar store as we speak. I'm reserving my right to cower on his shoulder.

...Come and get us, you motherfucking snakes!!
Tags: pop culture
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