Madam President, Queen of Snark (kellinator) wrote,
Madam President, Queen of Snark
kellinator

because I never get tired of making fun of Kobe

Because I need a little distraction, I'm going to try a little experiment tonight: Liveblogging the Suns/Lakers game.

Oh yeah, and I'm going to be drinking while I do it. I thought about taking a swig every time Kobe takes a shot, but I don't really want to give myself alcohol poisoning.

10:47 PM: One of the announcers just said this game was about the Lakers' "competitive spirit and energy." It should be a short game then.

10:48: James on Kobe's foul: "That's not a good way to start the game." Also, he looked up from his video game long enough to announce the Suns' uniforms are ugly.

 10:50:  Suns lead 11-0. What were they saying about competitive spirit and energy?

10:52: "Kobe cannot worry about the psyche of his teammates." Hey, why would he start now?

10:56: Missed the past four minutes because I misplaced my drink, stood up to look for it, and accidentally kicked it over. And I was still sober when I did this. Maybe this whole thing wasn't the best idea I've ever had.

11:05: Steve is so cute when he chews on his lip like that. Man, why did I think this would be a good game for my first liveblog? It's just going to turn out like Game 2 did and by halftime I'll have nothing to write about besides how many ways can I say "Kobe suuuuucks."

11:09: Never mind me. What will the announcers be talking about by midnight?

11:11: AIR-BALL!! AIR-BALL!!

11:14: "The Suns have now won seven consecutive quarters." I think TNT has a supercomputer dedicated to spitting out meaningless basketball stats.

11:18: Now the announcers are going on about how Kobe must be getting frustrated. Hey, he was the one who wanted to be The Man.

11:20: James: "What's wrong?" Me: "I can't think of anything interesting to write."

11:22: "The Lakers are trying to stay in this series." Not very hard.

11:23: "The Lakers have never been swept in the first round." James: "Well, they're about to be."

11:26: The only way I could give a shit about Jack Nicholson's birthday cake is if Duff from Ace of Cakes made it. Duff = TEH SEX.

11:27: They just said Phil Jackson was reminding Kobe that "great players make their teammates better." I truly think Phil is trying to give Kobe a nervous breakdown.

11:32: Katie objects to my liveblogging because she's trying to sleep on the mousepad.

11:36: James wants to use the computer and my liveblogging is pretty damn lame and nobody else on my flist care about the NBA anyway, so I hereby declare this liveblogging a failure. If anyone needs me, I'll be getting my drink on.
Tags: basketball, i hate the lakers, my basketball boyfriend steve nash, spoiled millionaires theater
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