Madam President, Queen of Snark (kellinator) wrote,
Madam President, Queen of Snark


I think it's time for another trip to the Land of Misfit Daters!!

Here are some gems from the "Intimate Encounter" side (if I ever take out an ad here, someone please shoot me):

"I'm more than just a skinny white boy! I'm also sexual deviant.
I really want to meet a woman who is a redhead/brunette with great tits."

I guess we should just appreciate him for his honesty.

"If I where to have to use two words to describe what I am looking for they would be trust and passion.
to me if you have these two things with someone there is nothing that can stop you.
I want to be able to think of that special someone all day long when we are apart. Not wanting to wait to be able to see them again .. And I would like the same feeling out of them.
to me everyone is different but if you have the above things your differances become not so important.
Thats all for now or I will start to ramble"

Sorry dude, I think you already started.

"12 And A Half Reasons To Say Hello"

Why do guys think that's a good thing? I believe Cosmo called that a "kidney scraper."

Then there's the guy who says he's "not shy to say that I'm a virgin and proud of it." So why is he advertising for a one-night stand?

"would like to have a great time n more.....
Thoughts of potential erotic encounters speed through my mind,
Secrets shared, disasters spared, every angle considered,
Mind spinning turmoil, how to make it all so good,
Bodies teased, your spirits pleased but only,
If you pledge yourself to me,

Mind blasting emotions as you lay naked and spread eagle
before me,
Such sacred beauty glowing in the dim light before my eyes,
Bonds straining, body aching, needing to feel,
My passions gaining momentum but only
If you pledge yourself to me,"

I'm sorry folks, but I have great difficulty passing up the opportunity to make fun of bad poetry. And "naked and spread-eagled" just doesn't scan or sound even remotely romantic.

Actually, I think this guy has the right idea:

"A few basic rules:
- You cannot spell "a lot" as one word
- You should know the difference between "your" and "you're"
- A guy holding the car door open for you should be seen as an act of kindness or caring, not of sexism
- I can't date anyone who likes Nascar or WWF"

I like this chick's nerve!

"heartless, calculating, gold digging tramp, out for blood"


"I have a very strong fantasy about meeting a strong man, with a big dog, who knows how to use it. I've never done it in real life, and am looking for the right person and his pet. Serious inquiries only"

Please please please tell me that she's not talking about a real dog.

  • (no subject)

    You know you're getting old when "too drunk to fuck" becomes "too drunk to floss."

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