September 8th, 2001

Daria

You know, today was a pretty darn good day.

I don't say that very often, so when I do it's worth writing down.

Today was lovely. I went to the English department picnic and socialized and petted cute doggies. Nothing big, but I'm working on appreciating the little things. I'm trying to take some inspiration from Jason's Buddhism. I'm thinking of story about the beautiful woman that he tells all the time; the unenlightened man sees her and is angry that he doesn't have her, the enlightened man sees her and is happy that he got the chance to appreciate her beauty.

I've always been a lot like that unenlightened man -- I've always been anxious to get as much out of life as I can, eager to climb the next mountain. But now I think that may be the wrong way to look at things. Because my parents wouldn't let me out much, I was always convinced I was missing something and irritated when nothing exciting happened.

But now I think that some days the most exciting thing that will happen is petting a friendly dog, and I want to embrace that. Give the little furry dog a hug. Just appreciate the small moments rather than looking for some new reason to panic.

Once an online buddy of mine told me this song reminded him of me:

Vienna
(by Billy Joel)

Slow down you crazy child
You're so ambitious for a juvenile
But then if you're so smart tell me why
You are still so afraid?

Where's the fire, what's the hurry about?
You better cool it off before you burn it out
You got so much to do and only
So many hours in a day

But you know that when the truth is told
That you can get what you want
Or you can just get old
You're gonna kick off before you even get halfway through
When will you realize
Vienna waits for you

Slow down you're doing fine
You can't be everything you want to be
Before your time
Although it's so romantic on the borderline tonight
Too bad but it's the life you lead
You're so ahead of yourself
That you forgot what you need
Though you can see when you're wrong

But you know you can't always see when you're right
You got your passion you got your pride
But don't you know only fools are satisfied?
Dream on, but don't imagine they'll all come true
When will you realize
Vienna waits for you

Slow down you crazy child
Take the phone off the hook
And disappear for a while
It's alright you can afford to lose a day or two
When will you realize
Vienna waits for you.
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