Well, I think I figured out what I want. And it's something I can never have.
I would make an awful Buddhist.
The cards say I am going to get what I want:
Where you are
Love, passion, emotional trial (turns out well).
Where you are going
Portends success in emotional and physical endeavours (card also suggestive of travel or change in environment).
How you will get there
Bright hopes, good prospects.
Transformation, joy, rebirth.
Life's wheel is turning in your favour, risks, gambles, likely to turn out well.
What will support your path
Freedom, innocence, rebellion, intoxication
Well, there's only one way to find out: Wait and see.
And no, I'm not going to tell you what I want.
I keep trying to explain LiveJournal to friends of mine. "Well, it's an online journal. But it's not exactly a journal. But it's like a journal."
Yeah, I know LiveJournal's a journal. But it's not the same kind of journal I keep when I just write stuff out in an old notebook. People are actually reading this. Therefore, I personally feel compelled to make a little bit of sense. I mean, I know it's my journal, but all the same it's out there for people to read and I don't want them to read it and go "man, she's an idiot."
And of course, there's the whole question of why do I (and so many others) put my journal out there for all the world to read? A., my ex-boyfriend/still good friend, doesn't understand it at all and thinks I'm a freak for doing it. (I haven't even fully identified him by name because I know he would consider even his first name being on here an invasion of the privacy he so treasures, and I respect that, because I respect him.) I even asked him if he wanted to see mine after I put it up, and he acted as if I was inviting him to do a mind invasion.
So am I an exhibitionist for putting all this up here? I don't think so. The writing clears my mind; it's been a godsend in these crazy weeks. And some of these things are things I want to share. LiveJournal is real, realer to me than some of the things I encounter every day. And I take a comfort in that.
Of course if I really am a freak, I don't mind ;)