October 26th, 2001


Once again, I bore even myself.

I scored 3 on the pervertedlogic.com CyberWhore Poll!

My heavens! You're an ONLINE NUN!

Are you sure you have ever actually BEEN online? That's not a TV you're sitting in front of, you know. How you have managed to avoid sex on the internet for so long makes you one for the record books. You're having your slutty sister fill this quiz in for you, aren't you? No wonder you list Vatican City as your profile location.

Letting the days go by

I knew there was something about the date today, but I couldn't remember what.

Then it hit me. Today would have been Joe's and my fourth anniversary.

(Well, we named it "our anniversary" retroactively; we were just friends going to the Rolling Stones concert together, and dinner at Amerigo's afterwards. You gotta admit that's a pretty spectacular first date. We had our first kiss a month later.)

I got an email from him today. He didn't mention it; I wonder if he remembered or not. I hope he didn't. I want him to go on and be happy. I want that so much for him.

I just... I don't think I'll ever stop feeling weird about it. I mean, today could have been my wedding day! And for a long time I thought that was what I wanted, what I needed. And even though I believe I did the right thing in ending it, I still wonder if it could have played out any differently. I guess I'll always wonder.
  • Current Music
    "Once in a Lifetime" -- Talking Heads