In the interests of a more harmonious work environment...
For months now I've been trying to convince my boss that we wouldn't have nearly as many problems with students and especially professors refusing to return overdue books if they'd just get me a taser.
After the last batch of "the rules don't apply to me, I'm a LAW PROFESSOR" offenses, I think I'm finally making some headway.
Will: Do you want a deluxe taser or just a regular one? Me: I want one like Samuel L. Jackson's lightsaber with "BMF" on the handle.