Back in the day...
I was a naive little 18-year-old freshman at Vanderbilt and I met this guy. His name was Nathan. Nathan decided he wanted me to be his girlfriend, and bad. Looking back on it, he kinda bullied me into going exclusive before I was ready, but I didn't exactly do anything to stop him. Once I got used to the idea, it was wonderful -- long phone calls over spring break, making out in his room all night, standing on street corners in the rain with his arm wrapped around me. And I let myself believe that he loved me, and I fell in love with him.
Then I invited him to a party called the Cross Dress Fest. He pronounced it sexually deviant, announced he couldn't deal with my liberal politics, and dumped me.
I took it hard. I cried until my nose was raw from all the drainage. I bought Tragic Kingdom by No Doubt, still the best breakup CD ever for my money, and played it constantly.
Then a week later my best friend got with Nathan.
I took it even harder. I mean, the people we date will break up with us sometimes. It's a part of life. And we will sometimes fall in love with people we shouldn't. We may even fall in love with our best friend's ex, and I can understand that.
But for my friend to look at my obvious pain -- the pain I had cried out to her -- and tell me I didn't have a right to it was out of line.
Actually, the friendship didn't end. But it was never the same. I couldn't trust her, and she couldn't understand me.
If you're wondering how the story ended, I was at a party about a month later and saw Nathan there. I mentioned it to a mutual friend the next day and that's when we discovered Nathan had lied to his new girlfriend about where he was going to be that night. She was all set to dump him for it. He sweet-talked her out of it and then dumped her two days later.